What is Relationship-Based Horsemanship?

Modern-day equestrianism can be divided into two parts. First, there's performance-based horsemanship, which looks to gain the horse's obedience to achieve compliance or optimal levels of performance ---- and then there's relationship-based horsemanship. Relationship-Based Horsemanship (RBH) is the practice of finding and preserving balance in the horse-human relationship. 

This differentiation is super important because there is a fundamental element that separates these two variations of horsemanship. One enhances ego. The other diminishes it. 

In performance-based horsemanship, we seek outward validation for the work. It’s an external experience emphasizing what the horse and human can do together. Relationship-based horsemanship, on the other hand, is an internal experience emphasizing what the horse and human feel together. Both performance-based horsemanship and relationship-based horsemanship have their place in the horse world right now, but they are VERY different.

RBH is art, not sport. Performance becomes increasingly less relevant to us as we go deeper. And although performance is not our priority, it will come regardless, because when the horse is engaged in this way, they are as responsive to us as we are to them. This takes the partnership to a whole other level because it's authentic. We do not just appear to be in harmony ... we truly are. Our energies are resonating ... and not just physically. We are connecting with them mentally and emotionally as well. In this sense, RBH can also be defined as the process of obtaining resonance with the horse.

Relationship-based horsemanship requires dedicated focus and the right intentions. We look to gain the admiration of the horse, not human spectators or followers as a result of getting the horse to do things for us. Our reason for practicing RBH is to develop deep, authentic bonds with our horses, where they bind to us by choice while still respecting our boundaries. It's an intrinsically motivating practice in mindfulness, where we remain continuously aware of how perceive us. The processes involved unveil who we really are as the energy we project outwards is reflected back to us through the horse's responses. In this way, RBH can be a path for immense inner growth if our intentions remain pure.

Relationship-based horsemanship prioritizes the emotional well-being of horses, but it is also more than simply befriending the horse. It's important to understand that RBH is not "pleasure riding". It is not natural horsemanship, it's not equine-assisted learning, and it's not R+ training. It's much more than any of these things and although it may encompass these areas of equestrianism, it cannot be defined by them. RBH is about balance in the relationship. It is a discipline for both the human and the horse, in which the horse becomes more cognitive and the human becomes more receptive. Both become more conscious. 

Humans are influential by nature. We are doers. Horses are feelers. To practice relationship-based horsemanship we must train ourselves to feel for the horse. We have to feel, listen, and observe deeply so we recognize when and how we need to respond to the horse as we interact with him. We seek dialogue with the horse. We do not dictate the course of the interaction. The sessions are dynamic and fluid. We want the horse to feel that it's ok to communicate with us. We encourage cooperative expression and sensibility, rather than submission. We spend as much time synchronizing with the horse as we do cueing him. We learn the importance of inaction, and why it is necessary to remain aware of our controlling tendencies. The horse must understand that he has choices. This helps him relax, and it encourages his desire to participate by allowing and empowering him to use his mind. In RBH, we do not train the horse, we educate him. We also condition ourselves to become more conscious of his perspective. This can become a very mystical experience if one allows it to be, but nonetheless, it's wildly enriching for both horse and human.

Relationship-based horsemanship is a direct, mutually beneficial experience between horses and humans. We are helping the horse expand his consciousness. The interesting thing is that in order to do this, we actually have to expand our own consciousness. We have to be able to notice our effects. We have to be able to see perspective. And we have to care. If we do not care, then we are simply not practicing relationship-based horsemanship.

... to be continued